Not that he watches TV before work anyway..

This morning's conversation with the significant other:

"What are you watching?"

"The Bodyguard."

"That's such a cheesy f-ing movie."

"Well, it's either that or infomercials."

"Let's watch infomercials."

"Go make breakfast, jerk."

I look like I could use another shot of Jager.

In Spirit of the Holiday..

I thought this post on craigslist was hilarious, so I absolutely HAD to share it today, of all days.


To the Stoner Who Works At Cottage Inn Pizza

You: the guy who answers the phone at cottage inn pizza
Me: Hungry and stoned out of my gourd

I called you from my cell phone but had completely forgot who I was calling by the time you answered the phone. Of course, you were also baked to bajeezus and forgot to tell me that I had called Cottage Inn.

When you answered and said, “Whatsup?” I thought about it, and after a 20 second pause I told you that was hungry. You suggested I try a pizza, and I agreed that it was probably a good idea.

Then I asked you if you sold pizza and you said that you could make me one. I said I wanted anchovies and something else on my pizza. You asked me what that something else was.

We spent five minutes listing toppings until we figured out that I was trying to remember how to say: “Sun dried Tomatoes.” When you said: “We'll bake that right up for you,” we both started laughing uncontrollably.
It was the best pizza I ever had; I just wanted to thank you for helping me out.


Happy 4/20.

Twister, anyone?

Wordless Wednesday #9

It's not that complicated!

If you're going to play April Fools jokes on me, don't try to trick me to my face. I can read you.

If you MUST try, just change my clocks from AM to PM. That's enough to screw anyone up.. like I did to you last year. And the year before.

People never learn..

In spirit of the "holiday", check out the Top 100 April Fools' Day Hoaxes of All Time.

New to Vox.

I signed up for a Vox blog today, just because I thought it could be the right community to push my music and other art into. I don't plan on doing anything cool with it right now, but I'll definitely be investing some time into it later on.

Check it out.

(And add me to your network if you've got an account.)