Just because my doggy is awesome.

A big thanks to Chris for putting Sharpie up as "Dog of the Day" on her blog, Diet & Skin Allergies in Dogs. Now everyone can see my cute, fuzzy, troublesome critter staring at them from the top right corner of the page. Also, if you're a dog freak, join her MyBlogLog community.

Wordless Wednesday #5

The Poo War

This is Sharpie. Cute, right? Smart as a whip, too. Well, as far as dogs go.

But for the past year, I've been dealing with a problem I now call "the poo war".

She's well trained, more than any other dog I know. She can sit, lie down, get my shoes for me, and she knows perfectly well that her toilet is outdoors.

But lately she's been acting out. Leaving her alone is like giving your 5-year-old child full reign of the house. Leaving her on the couch with a toy and the tv on is not enough. She has to go and take a dump in my nice big walk-in closet when I forget to shut her in the living room, as if to say, "Hey Mom! Screw you for leaving me alone like this!" Like taking her out before I leave is not good enough, her poo is too good to waste on that bush outside. It's almost like she's purposely holding in her load and praying for me to leave the living room door open. What a spiteful bitch.

Punishing her has no effect. It only makes her afraid of me for an hour or so, and then she does it again when the next opportunity arises. She's not stupid, she knows it's wrong, but she does it anyway. I'm going to lose my mind if it doesn't stop soon.

How do I break her of this?